Exploring The Pierates Oven
Last updated
Last updated
On March 22, 2022, all the Ovens of Pieland turned off. Without working Ovens, the maintenance and health of the Octopies were in serious trouble. A representative from each of the nine Slices formed the Fellowship of the Octopies (FOTO) to solve the crisis. The Fellowship first inspected the Piesons, the Pieborgs, Doughbots, and Pielanders Ovens. Their fifth stop: the Pierates Oven.
Or so the Fellowship thought. The Pierates representative boldly declared only the Pielanders member could visit the top-secret location of the Pierates’ homebase at Pierates Cove. The elusive Oven was the greatest of all Pierates treasures. The rest of the Fellowship were required to wait on the coast. Of course this insult created a mutiny among the group. The Vampiers and Doughbots delegates began cursing and waving their tentacles in anger. They both wanted to kick the Pierates Octopie out of the Fellowship immediately.
The Piesces member of the Fellowship, known for their positive vibes and respected by many Octopies, worked to calm the angry group. After much back and forth, the Pierate agreed to take two more Octopies - a Pieborg and Pieson. The Pierates respect the tentacle upgrades of the Pieborgs and reasoned that the amiable nature of the Piesons would not pose a threat. Despite some grumblings, the Vampier and Doughbot accepted this compromise. With that, the small band of Octopies took a dinghy out to sea to reach the protected cove where the Pierates Oven resides.
The Pierate expertly navigated the boat through dense fog that hid their haven from the watchful eyes of curious Octopies. The dinghy pulled into an inlet where the small exploration crew saw the imposing, weatherbeaten Pierates Oven sitting by the bay.
A handful of Pierates, armed with cutlasses and pistols and surrounded by dark steel cannons, met the Fellowship members near the entrance. The leader of the Pierates, with a greying beard and leather eyepatch, was an intimidating presence among the group. “Captain! Captain!” Squawked the pink parrot sitting on the Pierate leader’s shoulder. “Invaders! Invaders! Walk the plank! Walk the plank!”
The Fellowship slowly approached the Captain, who held a rather sharp sword in one tentacle and a hook in another. The small Fellowship group started to apologize for trespassing and explain why they were at the Pierates Oven. The Captain quickly waved the hook to cut them off.
“No need to explain,” the Captain said. “Arrr. We buccaneers spend our days scouting the seas to protect our cove. We’ve been watching your crew everrrrr since you got to the coast with the Vampiers and Doughbots. Scoundrels!” The other Pierates gathered at the Oven sneered and spit at the mention of the other Slices.
“Aye, you made it across the deadly channels of Pieland. I suppose the Kraken wasn’t hungry for Octopies today, eh? Well, come on then,” said the Captain. “I will give you a tour me-self.”
The Fellowship followed behind the Captain as they walked into the sacred oven. “S’pose you want to know how we got this Oven started. Think we stole the mighty flame from the GrandOven, do you? Aye, we took it fair and square from the Pieous."
The Pierates Oven, like the others that were inspected, was mysteriously cold. Barrels of gunpowder and rum lined the long, dank corridors of the Oven. Some Pierates sprawled on top of the barrels of rum, burping and singing bawdy songs, having drank too much during quality control inspection. The Pieborgs representative rolled its bionic eye in disgust.
“Arrrr, the Pieous,” continued the Captain, stepping over an inebriated Pierate. “We took a trip to see them. Back then, we had only one pierate ship filled with our kind. We got the Flame from the GrandOven in exchange for a barrel of gunpowder once every six moons. We didn't like this trade agreement, but we needed more Octopies to run our ships, so we took the deal! The Pieous asked us to map out the islands of the Pieland’s coasts. That part was easy. Of course, we arrrrre Pierates. Exploring the seas is what we do!”
The Piesons representative asked if something had gone wrong with recent gunpowder deliveries. Perhaps the Pierates broke their deal? The Captained turned to this Octopie and had its hook pointed right at the Pieson’s neck as the Pierates’ leader frowned. “Listen here, Pieson. We Pierates neverrrrr break our deal. Them be Pierates’ code! We delivered every barrel of gunpowder every time,” the Captain said and then hesitated. “The maps, we were a bit slower with. Aye, it’s hard to make accurate maps after enjoying a hearrrrrty bottle of rum. Who cares about some silly maps! The Pieous never leave their little fortress anyway!”
“Drink up! Drink up!” the Captain’s parrot said.
The remainder of the Pierates tour finished in silence as the FOTO returned to the coastline, where the other Octopies were waiting. The small crew explained everything the Captain had told them and the details of their investigation. Those that waited on land were confused. The Pierates had held up their agreement with the Pieous, so why were they being punished? Maybe this wasn’t the work of the Pieous? The Vampiers member pointed out that the Pierates failed to properly map out the coastal islands of Pieland and that the rest of the Fellowship were too hasty in assuming the Pieous wouldn’t be angered by that. It was hard to trust the word of a Vampier when it was against a Pierate though.
The Fellowship’s morale hit an all-time low. After many interviews and five Oven inspections, the group was no closer to the truth than before they started. The Piesces member broke the mood by suggesting a trip to the Piesces’ Oven. Perhaps some surfing and a little relaxation on the beach could help.
