Exploring the Pieborgs Oven

All the Ovens of Pieland went cold at the same time on March 22, 2022. Octopies from each of the nine Slices formed a group called the Fellowship of the Octopies to fix the Ovens. They first visited the Piesons Oven. After coming up empty, they moved next to the Pieborgs Oven.

The Pieborgs had a full pie body scanner to detect metals, which were required to explore the Pieborgs Oven. That meant only the Pieborgs, who had android features, and the Doughbots, who were 100% machine, could pass through. The rest of the Fellowship weren’t happy to sit this one out. Many started to panic and worried they were missing out. One Pielander complained, “We should have called ourselves the Fellowship of Many Octopies. Aka - FOMO.”

The Pieborgs Oven

The Pieborgs and Doughbots team soon returned with no clues as to why their Oven went cold. Like the group that explored the Piesons Oven, there was no evidence of tampering. The Pieborgs, well-known for their sophisticated engineering, scoffed at the idea of any mechanical failure for their Oven.

A Piesces representative shook their head vigorously at the Pieborgs. “I have my pie on you,” the Piesces delegate said. “What about you Doughbots? What really went on up there? What are the Pieborgs not telling us? Speak!”

The Veteran, one of the leaders of the Pieborgs, walked up and pointed his silver sword at the Piesces representative. Steam was coming out of The Veteran’s metal-domed crust. The Pieborgs were a prideful group that considered themselves superior to Slices like the Piesons and the Piesces who lacked artificial intelligence or body enhancements. Sensing a potential brawl, the Mechanic, another Pieborg, stepped in between the two angry Octopies.

“Everyone, please. Let’s all cool down our pies, and let us explain,” said The Mechanic. “The Pieous helped us light our Oven. Like all Slices of Pieland, the Pieous group provided a powerful flame from the Grandoven to help us bake Octopies. We have no evidence that the Pieous are responsible for this.”

Among the Fellowship, the leading theory was that the Pieous were punishing the Octopies. It started with the Piesons, who had broken an agreement to send the Pieous funds in exchange for the special flame. The Veteran leaned against the sword and cleared its throat.

“We may have had a minor issue with the Pieous,” The Veteran said. “Long ago, before the Pieborg Oven existed, I took a bad hit to my head and it started to crumble. There was a huge gash in my pastry topper and some of my filling spilled out. The Mechanic came to my rescue and kneaded a titanium cover and rolled it over my head. I also had three of my tentacles replaced with bionic materials. I’m alive today because of the brilliant work of The Mechanic.”

“We soon realized we did not fit in with the other non-augmented Octopie Slices. We went to the Pieous and requested a special flame from the Grandoven to create our own sopiety. They agreed on the condition that we share our scientific data and AI research, as well as build them an Octopie that was 100% robotic that they could control. When we built the final prototype of the drone Octopies, things didn’t go as planned. We turned it on and the drone began to freely speak and express itself. Before we could deliver to the Pieous, the drone willfully sped away.”

“Eventually, this freak accident went on to form a new Octopie Slice - The Doughbots. They produced more sentient drones and became our neighbors. We now work with the Doughbots, forging an alliance that benefits us both. Me and the Mechanic, along with all other Pieborgs, vowed to never try and produce a 100% robotic Octopie again. We also explained to the Pieous we could no longer build more drones. We did share our findings, but they were pretty upset and stopped being so responsive to us after that. Is it possible that the Pieous waited this long to punish us now?”

The Fellowship discussed this latest revelation. They all agreed the only logical next step was to visit the Doughbots Oven and see what pie crumbs would follow next...